Y’all Having Ninja Sex too?

I won’t be before you long, but where in the parent handbook did y’all write, “Once a binky, you can’t get kinky!”....? Asking for a friend (I am the friend). I’m really trying to create a dialogue here.

Nobody is talking about it so I thought I’d jump in. I ain’t gone lie, it’s getting real creative out here. Unnecessarily creative. I can only imagine what couples with multiple small children go through, I mean... Yikes. I’m out here sending texts in the middle of the night like smoke signals, letting him know the coast is clear. Meaning- the baby is asleep, only to be interrupted by the supposed sleeping child! And I swear they can sense it! They can feel it in the air, and they be like “AHT AHT! Mommy!!!” (cue the tears). It was like an adventure at first, but now I’m like 😒.

I love my baby, but CUH-LAWD HAVE MERCY!! Then we start adhering to our schedules, giving each other the “eyes” over dirty diapers and inspection reports 😂, (My husband is a Property Inspector) waiting for nap time. Sliding in the DM’s like we’re strangers and what not smh. Oh how I miss the days of random dates, and love on a whim. Maybe it’s only like this for the first year—don’t ruin it for me, let me encourage myself in the Lord 😂. Am I alone? Somebody, tell me something good. 😂

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